Friday, January 30, 2009

My Tarot Reading today....Makes a girl go MMMmmhhhh???????



The atmosphere is hot and fiery today in the romantic sphere, dear donna, much too hot for your taste! For you, who aspire towards clarity of feelings, it is even more difficult under the auspices of Justice, to understand the wild passions that have taken a grip on the people you're emotionally close to. The Devil is sweeping everyone off their feet today. That means that serenity, calm and quiet reflection are out of the window! Instead you'll need to cope with plenty of aggression and very possessive feelings. You'll need to overcome the traps that passion sets up. At work, the combination of the Moon and the Devil indicates that you have tremendous creative ability, but that a colleague or rival is trying to control you, and maybe even to steal the results of your work. If you have a good idea, don't let someone else take the credit! If you don't lay claim to your own talents, someone else will!

Warning...graphic language ahead...Read at your own risk....



Of course, if any of you have been reading me for any length of time, then you are no stranger to that fact. Yesterday was a mess here at work. I get one problem resolved, seems there is always another one to take it's place. Mr. Burns is very difficult to work with, another argument occurred yesterday that resulted in both of us being disciplined by our branch manager..the big boss...I cried....almost all day. Nothing sucks worse to lose your cool and cry at work. I hate that.

In general, at the moment...I hate my life! Because of my job primarily...also, how it seems like nothing can ever go right. The only bright spot in my life is my family...I don't hate them. They are the only thing that keeps me going.

I left for lunch yesterday, went to McDonald's for a salad....while sitting in the car, listening to the radio...I heard this song...never heard it before...it was after the arguement with Mr. Burns, keep that in mind, and I determined that it couldn't have been more of coincidence and could not apply more to my frame of mind at the moment. Keep in mind, the following does not apply to my family or any of my lovely readers/friends.....just consider this my rant for the week....critizing life in general, how it seems sometimes, you just can't ever catch a break.

Hate My Life...by Theory of a Deadman....(excerpts from the song)

"Hate My Life"

So sick of the hobos always begging for change
I don't like how I gotta work and
They just sit around and get paid
I hate all of the people who can't drive their cars.
Bitch you better get outta the way
Before I start falling apart

I hate my job, all of my rich friends
I hate everyone to the bitter end.
Nothing turns out right There's no end in sight
I hate my life!

I still hate my job, my boss is a dick
"I don't get paid nearly enough
To put up with all of your shit"

I hate my job, all of my rich friends
I hate everyone to the bitter end.
Nothing turns out right There's no end in sight
I hate my life!

So if you're pissed like me
Bitches, here's what you gotta do
Put your middle fingers up in the air
Go on and say "Fuck you!"

I hate my job, all of my rich friends
I hate everyone to the bitter end.
Nothing turns out right There's no end in sight
I hate my life!

So much at stake, can't catch a break
I hate my life
No, it's nothing new hear "it sucks to be you"
I fuckin hate my life

Now, this may seem a little harsh to some of you...some of you may say, Oh, Dixie...get off your pity party....I am not having a pity party....I just get tired of the bullshit sometimes...tell me one of you that has not....this was just a little rant, I feel better, now I am going to move forward.

I am very much looking forward to my weekend....I so need a break from this flourescent lighted hell....I hope you all enjoy yours....

Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Feeling a little flustered.....



Wow...I have really sucked at posting lately...don't even mention my reading any of my favorite blogs....thus far, 2009 as sucked ass....so, needless to say, I have been feeling a little bewildered and flustered.

I am having IRS problems, which have delayed my tax refund....fortunately, that has been taken care of, due to an ERROR that was not my fault!

Work is horrific right now...I may be wrote up today. I made a data entry error on a customers account...from last year, so the company may have to write off debt of around $400 from his account. I didn't sleep a wink last night, worrying about it. The office manager is one of my close friends, at least I thought she was....she is pissed, to say the least! She is like the Accounts Receivable Nazi.....God love her! I know that's her job, and when we screw up, it affects her and her job.

I wrecked my car....my front in of my little Saturn is smashed in....I won't go into details, but it's probably close to a $1000 bucks worth of damage...I did this Sunday, on my 2nd childs birthday. He turned 15 on Sunday.We were on our way to his birthday lunch. I feel guilty, I didn't make an elaborate birthday post for him on this blog. I did last year. We did celebrate though....he got an IPOD touch from his father for Christmas, so I bought him an Itunes card and a carrier/case that straps onto his arm, so he can use it when working out for football. He seemed pleased...

Speaking of working out, I haven't been going to the gym nearly enough...my goal for the New Year was to go 4 times a week...I have been averaging 2 times a week.
I suck! I did go last night and I am paying for it today. I am so sore...on top of that, I haven't slept any for two nights now...and Sicilian, I did try some Chamomile tea, 2 cups last night, and it didn't work for me....Wine works for me....lol.

But, I am trying not to drink any wine during the week...bad habits could form, and I don't want to go there...so, I have to save my imbibing for the weekend.

Oh, and cheesecake....that would help a lot too...but, thanks to the desire to stay skinny...I haven't ate cheesecake in a year....maybe I need too.

Oh, well...wish me luck with the work issue....hopefully I can find a loop hole somewhere and resolve the situation to every one's satisfaction...I doubt it..but, a girl can dream right?

Later......

We did celebrate

Wednesday, January 21, 2009

Back to the Island...Lost premieres tonight.....



I am so excited.....I am so hoping this season will answer a lot of questions, the main one being, the answers to Locke's death....I am hoping it won't be a disappointment.

What questions do you want answered?

Friday, January 16, 2009

FREE MOVIE WEBSITE....

I know I have posted about this before...but for those of you who are new to Dixie's site.....I have a little treat for you....

If you are bored this weekend and don't want to make a trek out to the video store...go to this link....watchmovies.net

I have watched Twighlight, Pineapple Express, Hancock, Step-Brothers and lots of other movies on here....you will find some movies won't play, the quality of some is better than others...but play around with it, you will find some that will and you won't have to pay a rental fee....enjoy!

BRRRrrrrrrr......Baby It's Cold Outside......



Holy crap! It is currently -12 degrees outside....A couple days ago, we got around 4 inches of snow....not a lot compared to some places, but to this little Southern girl, any snow is a lot.

School has been cancelled for the last two days. The roads are really not bad, so I assume that it is because of the temps....with the windchill, it's something like 30 below....I am so looking forward to Spring. I hate cold weather...I hate bundling up...but, what are you going to do?

Since schools were closed yesterday, that left hubby at home...alone...with both kids all day yesterday...after working 3rd shift the night before....unfortunately, they do nothing but fight/argue, do not allow hubby to get any sleep...so, he was up all day with them. He told me to go ahead and go to the gym, after work, pick them up something for dinner, then he would lay down for a few hours when I got home...So, I went to the gym, as I was changing my clothes, I heard a couple of women, apparently teachers, saying all TSC school's were closed Friday....I stuck my head around the corner, apologized for eavesdropping/interrupting, asked them, "For sure? TSC schools are closed Friday?"...they replied yes, so I thought Holy Crap...there is no way that hubby can go another day, be at home with those two all day again Friday, so I had to come up with a plan. Hubby's Mom, supposedly was coming to Lafayette that day, or so I thought, so I whipped out the cell phone, called her up, to see if they could go ahead and come by the house and pick up Max for his weekend visit with them, a day early...but, they had not came to Lafayette after all...but were willing to meet me, later that evening to pick him up at the half way point, which is in Crawfordsville....I told them 8 p.m. would be fine...then, I called the Ex for Aaron, he said he could pick him up around 7....I looked at the time, it was after 5 p.m. at that point...I knew there was no way that I could fit a work out in, as I still had to go by the pharmacy and get Aaron's ADD medicine, I still had to feed the boys, pack their clothes, etc...so, I changed back into my regular clothes and left the gym...another work out foiled! I just can't seem to get that 4 per week like I want...again, as of today, I have only been one day this week....anyway, I ran my errands, picked up the boys dinner, came home, fed them, packed for them, the ex picked up Aaron exactly at 7 p.m. and Max and I made the 30 minute trip to meet the inlaws...they were a little late meeting me, but not too bad, putting me back home around 8:30 last night...
This has been such a long week....with Mr. Burns in the office, all day every day this week, the weather, the extra running around last night...I am so looking forward to this weekend! I want to do nothing more tonight then watch movies, drink wine, have a great dinner and relax...not sure what hubby wants to do..he does have to work tonight....so, we will see. I may try again to go the gym...just hard to find the motivation on a Friday night...with the weather so cold. Hubby wants to go out tomorrow night, that I do know....and it's so cold out, I don't know now if we will...I don't relish the thought of dressing up and going out in below zero temperatures....

Well, I have a conference call...so, I better go...

Hope you all have a terrific Friday and a relaxing wonderful weekend! If you are in an area that is as cold/colder like where I live..STAY WARM!!!!!!

So,

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

I Am Alive....I Have On My Happy Face....Kind of....



Wow, I can't believe it has been over a week since my last post. I have been super busy, at work and at home...and blogging has just not been on my list of "things to do"...I am so far behind on all of my favorite bloggers blogs, it would take me several days just to catch up....hopefully, things will calm down for me soon, and I can get the time to check in with all of you.

I hope everyone had the happiest of holidays....I am just now recovering from mine. I was quite depressed there for a while....it took every bit of energy I had just to get out of bed, go to work and get through my day. I was in kind of a dark place there for awhile...but, I am doing better. I somewhat have my "happy face" back...(see above picture)...I got a lot of wonderful advice from some of my very favorite bloggers and I just personally want to say thanks to all of you...you know who you are. Thanks for not giving up on me or my blog, and coming back daily, or somewhere around in there, to check up on me.

I have tried really hard to put my 18 year old's harsh words and behavior behind me.
14 year old did come up to visit last weekend. We had a great weekend together. Things seem almost back to normal. I have heard from 18 year old once since the blow up....he called to tell me that his car bit the dust....hinting at money from me to help him get a new one. I can't help him get another one...when we had our arguement Christmas night, he made the wise ass comment to me that I needed to manage my money better...he who had no clue what the hell he was saying, or what bills I have, add in the fact that 9 years old dad has not paid support in months and months....9 year old's monthly medicine bill of $135, Max's monthly bill for school of $300, car payments, utilities, insurance, medical, food and gas. The boy had no clue how out of line he was when he said that, add into that fact hubby having his hours cut right at Christmas and that overtime money obsolete, made for a really tight Christmas, which I think is what spawned part of our argument, because he didn't get what he thought he should...anyhoo...back to his car...I think he now understands and maybe he should have "managed his money better"....instead of blowing it on his girlfriend, clothes, etc...he should have been saving half of each one of his paychecks for the past year, then he would be able to go out and buy another car...as it stands, I can't help him, as I have no extra money. He will get money from me and hubby when he graduates this year, and if he doesn't have a car by then, then that should be used to put down towards one. I am sure he will have one though, as it step mother told me Sunday when delivering 14 year old home, that her and the ex were going to try and co-sign to help him get a good used car.
I hope they can....he is almost 19 years old...I was married, making payments on my second car by that time, and had him, when I was 19 years old. He still has lots of growing up to do.

Moving on....let's talk about weather. I am so SICK of Winter...seriously, me and cold weather, we don't do well at all. I freeze to death all of the time. They keep the thermostat turned way down here at work, like 65 degrees...and I sit here, all day in my freaking coat...I need to go buy one of those little space heaters.....I can't stand it....what is it about Winter time, that makes you sleepy...I am sleepy all of the time. After my work day, all I want to do is go home, put on my warm robe and jammies, and do nothing....it has been so hard to get/find motivation to go to the gym 4 times a week, as I stated I was going to try to do in my New Year's resolutions....so far, I haven't kept that up. I went one time last week, and so far only once this week....in all fairness, the roads have been icy lately, and I get scared when having to drive on icy roads after dark. It is about 8 miles to the gym from my work, maybe 20 from the gym home. So, last week, it just didn't work out for me to go....Hopefully, this week will be better for that....I have kept my weight off...holding steady at 114 lbs....it's been almost a year since I started my diet and I am happy that I can say, its no longer a diet...just a lifestyle change....now, I am at a point that I can eat pretty much what I want, in moderation...as long as I put in my time at the gym.....winter sucks, because it's hard for me to find the motivation....Once I get to the gym, that is another story...I feel really good after my 2 hour work out session....it's just the getting there part that is hard.

Another thing I hate about Winter...there seems to be nothing on T.V. anymore....I am so looking forward to Lost starting back a week from this Thursday...yay!
Also, tonight starts the new season of American Idol...I haven't decided if I am going to blog about it or not....my blogging time is usually a few minutes here or there at work, because once I am home in the evening, I don't have time to be on the computer...that would be "me" time, and unfortunatley, I don't get much of that at home.....anyhoo...I will see....Mr. Burns has been in the office a lot lately, every day, all day....makes for a terribly long day for me, hence the no blogging post lately.....he stepped out to meet a client, giving me time to finally make another post...

Oops, speak of the devil...

Well, Mr. Burns is back in the office...gotta run for now....

Dixiechick..out.

Tuesday, January 6, 2009

How's it going?



Sorry I have been M.I.A lately....I am entering my extremely busy renewal time at work, files stacked up to my chin, with data entry to do...very long, tedious process. I am working through my lunch....and I am so tired, I am sitting here contemplating running down to the Village Pantry for a Red Bull...coffee is just not cutting it. I haven't been sleeping well, practically none for the past two nights....exhaustion is a word that describes me well. I think I will be taking myself a sleeping pill tonight...insomnia and I are not friends!

Guess I still have a lot on my mind...still haven't quite got over my 18 year olds behavior Christmas night. I think indirectly it affected 14 year old as well. I call to talk to them, conversation seems forced/strained....I asked 14 year old if he was going to come up for the weekend, he usually says yes, but this time...he hesitated adn said "I will try"....so, I doubt that he will be up. Sigh...I just don't know what to do...I feel like somehow, since I didn't give them this big Christmas, that I have let them down. The ex doesn't require me to pay child support, he has a very well paying job, so he says he doesn't need anything from me....yet, I feel I need to do more for them..and hubby makes me feel guilty if I even suggest spending any of "our" money on them....18 year old is graduating this year, I feel I should give him a substantial graduation present...but, I am scared to even bring the topic up with hubby....I wish that I had a way to squirrel some money away, save it without him getting upset with me...

Oh, well...I can only do what I can....I sure do love my kids and I miss them...I feel like I am losing out in their lives...(the oldest 2)....it causes me a lot of anxiety, that is for sure. I just wish they knew how much I love them, how much I worry about them, how much I wish I could give them the world.

Well, work is waiting on me....I have got to buckle down and get this project done.

Dixiechick...out!

Friday, January 2, 2009

Happy New Year Everyone!

I hope that all of you and your families have a wonderful 2009! Mine has to be better...in fact, I am determined for it to be. Hubby and I celebrated with friends....we had a lot of fun...a much needed party after the stress of the holidays.

I partied maybe just a little too much...a friend of ours owns one of the oldest bars in Lafayette and let's just say he was not stingy with the expensive champagne and wine...I may have embibed just a little too much. But, hubby doesn't drink, he was driving, so I was able to let loose and have some fun...

But the next day, I definitely paid for it....

I kind of looked and felt like this:



It took me most of the day to recover....I hate having a hang over...I am getting too old for it. It took me all day to recover...a fact I am definitely not proud of. But, it was a fun time....I laid in bed and thought of my New Year's resolutions. I don't have a whole lot this year. My main resolution from last year was to lose weight...I accomplished that...so, this year My goals are:

1.) Maintain my weight loss.

2.) Go the gym at least 4 times a week

3.) Work on my patience level

4.) Quit cursing so much

5.) Spend more Play time with my kids

6.) Manage our finances a little better...I.e. Christmas savings, regular savings

7.) Work on my happiness a little more, so that way I can make my kids happier.

That's it...that's all I have....Wishing you all the happiest of New Year's!